Things I never thought I'd say!

Shortly after Morgan turned two I said I was going to write a book titled "The things I never thought I'd say". Morgan is tuning 4 next month and her brother is turning 2....I now have more then enough material for a whole series of books.

I have said every one of the following things to my children over the past two years, here's a small sampling from the chaper I'd call PLEASE DON'T...

Please don't stick crayons in the dogs bum.
Please don't put your popcorn in the heat vent.
Please don't hit your sister with a shovel.
Please don't drink the dog water.
Please don't eat the dog cookies.
Please don't shampoo your hair with your pudding.
Please don't use your markers for facepainting.
Please don't fingerpaint the table with your yogurt.
Please don't feed your doll sprinkles.
Please don't feed the dog with your spoon.
Please don't color your brother.
Please don't put marbles in your panties.
Please don't hide in the fridge.
Please don't play barbie beach in the toilet.
Please don't put marshmallows up your nose.
Please don't put peas (corn/carrots/mashed potatoes etc.) in your ears.
Please don't snort your goldfish crackers up your nose.
Please don't hang from the light.
Please don't try to push your brother down the stairs in that basket.
Please don't ride your car down the stairs.
Please don't let the dog eat out of your mouth.
And finally:

Pleeeeeaaase don't BRING me the dog poop!