Do you ever wonder.....

We decided when we moved to this new house that we were done having babies. We have what some would call the "million dollar family", one boy, one girl, one dog and two parents. We made this decision based on many things, our age, the fact that our son has a kidney condition that is likely an inherited trait, that we suffered from infertility and didn't know whether we'd want to cross that bridge again and the fact that this new house didn't have enough room for 5. These are all reasonable and practical reasons for not wanting another child. Now that are kids are 4 & 2 (and toilet trained!) we can do things we otherwise wouldn't have attempted with a baby, like go to sporting events, go camping and they are both interested in these things and don't need to be entertained 24-7. They both have their own room with room to play and they play together. At no point have I regretted this choice, this is probably "what is best" but I have to admit to always having wanted more then two kids. Had things been different and we'd started our family 9 years ago like we'd planned we probably would have had more then two, but a miscarriage and subsequent infertility change that for us. I wonder every now and then what it would be like to have more then two, especially now that my kids are passed the baby stage and everyone around me (well on Facebook anyway) seems to be pregnant. I had no issues parting with our baby clothes and our baby furniture and I gladly dumped my maternity clothes at Value Village with a great big smile but now every so often I wonder.... maybe it would be nice to have one more? Did we make a hasty decision? I am after all only 33, and have a few good years of baby making left right? But then I think, Jeff is 38 and do we want a 20 year at home when he's pushing 60??? Probably not. I guess if the ship had officially sailed on this issue I wouldn't be having these thoughts. We've never made this a permanent decision if you know what I mean....maybe it's time to do that and then I won't need to wonder anymore. Or maybe, it has more to do with knowing that soon we WILL have to close the door on the issue and that it wouldn't be possible to change our mind, perhaps that's why I'm thinking about it these days. It's funny how these things come about all of a sudden, if you'd asked me even 6 months ago if I ever thought about having another baby the answer would have been a "never" and now here I am thinking about it....don't worry....it's just thinking about it, it's not actually going to happen....I mean that would just be crazy!