Weeing him off the "doo-doo"

So I'm going to start this post by saying YES, my 2.5 year old son still has a soother....if you are anti-toddler-soother you're welcome to post your comments here....you're welcome to comment on my blog, just no lectures please. I stand by my choice to allow my children to have soothers until they are older....no amount of negative criticism will change that. And just for kicks I think Dr. Ferber and Dr. Weisenbluth are crackpots....I proudly and lovingly rocked my babies to sleep every night until they were ready to go to sleep on their own and believe it or not Ferberizers that does happen!! Right around the same time your kid stops crying when you put them down. Anyway, more about that another day.......

So I've we've decided to start weening John off his soother. I've noticed in recent months that he's been using it more and more often but only if it's around. If it's not here, he doesn't use it. So, we took the brave step yesterday and informed him that soothers are only for bedtime and naps and should he want his soother he's allowed to have it in his room. This morning he came down with it and laid on the couch with it for a bit. Once he got up though I took it and put it back in his room. He cried a little yesterday but I assured him he's welcome to use it in his room. I don't feel that just taking it and throwing it in the garbage is fair. I mean if someone decided I wasn't allowed to drink coffee anymore and just tossed out my coffee pot I'd be pretty pissed. If they first said I could only have one cup a day for a while and then once I got over the addiction they took it away, or better yet let me decide that I was ready to give it up all together. I'd be a little more willing to give it up.
With Morgan (who was over 3 when she gave up her soother) we did a similar thing. When it became 'time' (aka when she really was too old for it) we started to suggest that she give her soother to the soother fairy when she was ready and that the soother fairy would bring her any toy she wanted. One morning about a week after we started to really PUSH the soother fairy she walked into my room and said "Here Mommy, can we give this to the soother fairy today?". I was shocked that it was that easy, I ran to the store and bought her a cuddle toy in the hopes that would ease her loss in the night and the toy she had decided she wanted. That night we put the soother in a fancy little bag under her pillow and the soother fairy came and left the gifts. She didn't cry once, not a drop, one night she was looking a little teary eyed and said she missed it but other then that nothing! Why? because it was HER choice, she knew she decided. We praised her for what a big girl she was and gave her lots of extra cuddles that week. She was really proud of herself and instead of ripping it away from her and making her feel like she had no control over the situation we let her decided and gave her a sense of pride and responsibility.
I also used a similar tactic to get John off the bottle. We told him one day that "soon" he'd have to give his bottles to another little baby. I kept asking him, "are you ready to give up your bottle?". One day he said yes, so we put them in a gift bag and drove them to our local Value Village and dropped them off. I told him it was the baby store, he was happy with that explanation. Then went next door to Toys R Us and let him shop for a big boy toy. He cried that night but didn't ask for his bottle because again, he knew HE decided. In both cases I disposed of the items of completely, they were gone so that no one would accidentally find one and also so that if things got 'hairy' I wouldn't cave in.
We are almost there with John and his soother. We've started discussing what toys he might want from the soother fairy and let him know his soother will be given to a much smaller baby for them to love. For now we'll just start the weening process and go from there.